new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize