Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
