so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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