Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
