Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
