I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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