dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
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