do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
