smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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