He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I AM VODKA MAN
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
He? As in you personified your dick?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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