So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Is Oprah even human
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