I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
