hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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