I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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