Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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