whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
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