I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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