sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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