Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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