So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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