and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
