just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
we're making bets on your personal life
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
