Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
This can only be settled by a dance off.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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