thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
