hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
you never un-have a 4some
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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