Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
