I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
