Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
