yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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