kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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