You really coming over, don't trick.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
