a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
