It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
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