You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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