i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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