He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
