Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
