if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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