i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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