I think my vagina is haunted
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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