Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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