it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
