Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
