You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
