Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  your parents love me but you hate me

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  (586): your parents love me but you hate me http://tfl.nu/ldwf
  Replies (8) Good night (1190) Bad night (2786)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come

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  (313): im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come http://tfl.nu/9b59
  Replies (30) Good night (4217) Bad night (800)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.

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  (440): I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit. http://tfl.nu/ddzq
  Replies (7) Good night (1061) Bad night (3135)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"

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  (815): i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out" http://tfl.nu/k16a
  Replies (9) Good night (1594) Bad night (5517)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.

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  (210): happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal. http://tfl.nu/4nij
  Replies (49) Good night (7540) Bad night (2199)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.

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  (+44): Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket. http://tfl.nu/5ggv
  Replies (11) Good night (4186) Bad night (1159)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??

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  (816): I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right?? http://tfl.nu/udb6
  Replies (31) Good night (7956) Bad night (1452)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex

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  (907): She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex http://tfl.nu/o751
  Replies (18) Good night (4111) Bad night (1349)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads

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  (516): Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads http://tfl.nu/zprq
  Replies (2) Good night (2813) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?

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  (785): Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head? http://tfl.nu/u71n
  Replies (4) Good night (1665) Bad night (866)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?

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  (303): Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week? http://tfl.nu/361o
  Replies (12) Good night (4147) Bad night (811)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?

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  (320): How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash? http://tfl.nu/c8co
  Replies (13) Good night (777) Bad night (366)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.

  (425): View more from Washington

  I'll pay?

  (206): View more from Washington

  Pick me up at 9.

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  (206): Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you. (425): I'll pay? (206): Pick me up at 9. http://tfl.nu/l115
  Replies (2) Good night (1105) Bad night (497)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.

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  (586): You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas. http://tfl.nu/7o12
  Replies (7) Good night (1292) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.

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  (443): I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs. http://tfl.nu/ye8d
  Replies (3) Good night (842) Bad night (221)

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