I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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