Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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