so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
