i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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