ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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