Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
