So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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