Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
